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← Rapture site sends unbelievers their last chance ... via email

hmcook87's Avatar Jump to comment 54 by hmcook87

Wow, the form letter that raptureletters.com sends out, actually has the lines you need to say to get saved:

"Father I admit I am a
sinner, and I will turn from my sin and do good. I believe that Jesus was
your son and that He came here to die for me so that my sins would be
forgiven. I ask you to forgive me and I will repent of my sins. In Jesus
name I pray."

Translated:

Dad, I'm a total loser. But I don't want to be a looser anymore. I promise I'll be good. Really. I think you impregnated a 14 year old 2000 years ago, so watching the kid die could put you in a good enough mood to forgive the losers you created. I'm sorry I was such a dick from the moment I was conceived. And I'll name-drop Jesus at the end just for good measure.

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 16:24:00 UTC | #185248