Well done Lisa for your tremendous courage in your oppenness relating your awful experience. Apart form the horror of the experience itself, this is what stands out, in addition the kindness of RD to not merely reply but to send you copies of not only his own but other books to help you in your situation, belying the image of him some of his critics represent.

From your picture you appear to be a very attractive woman, and it is very sad that you should have had such low self-confidence in finding a partner and also should have wanted to coverup and hide yourself away so much. You are also clearly clearly highly intelligent and informed.

Recovery must be hard for you but you have made so much progress by being able to talk of your experiences. Such courage and insight you have gained will stand you well in future. My very best wishes. :)