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← America and Eurasia 'to meet at north pole'

TheVirginian's Avatar Jump to comment 12 by TheVirginian

I'm glad for this insider trading tip. I've sent my stock broker an order for a big purchase of shares in the Acme Super Collision Helmet company. Their website just announced that their helmets have been proven to withstand even the impact of two landmasses simultaneously and provide full protection for your skull when the Big Crash occurs. The stock was trading at about 10 cents when I bought it, but is now up to $2 and rising. Hurry to buy your shares before the Big Investors get wind of this. Anyone who buys in in the next 24 hours will make a killing! I'm going to be rich! Rich! Rich! I'll be able to afford a yacht to float offshore and watch the collision. (Of course, I'll be wearing my helmet in case my pilot miscalculates where to anchor before the crash.) You can too, but only if you hurry to buy. Now! Now! Now! BTW, anyone want to join me in putting up money to help a Nigerian oil billionaire's widow smuggle his fortune out of the country? I'll go halfsies. Just contact me and I'll give you my bank account number to send your share of our good faith money.

Fri, 10 Feb 2012 07:05:34 UTC | #916119